Friday, October 12, 2007

You've Got A Friend


Friendship is to be cherished and honored at all times. I've heard it said it takes a LOT of time to build a true friendship and a millisecond to destroy it. I believe it. I've seen it done. I've done it.

Trust & truth are the building blocks for deep, inner-circle relationships. Because of this truth I really value friendships I have with very few people. I'm not one to have new best friend on a weekly basis. Nope. Not my style. A part of me admires people who can open up to others so quickly. Uh uh. Not I.

"People, let me tell ya 'bout m'best friend(s)."

In order of appearance I want to sing the praises of a few folks that have meant the world to me.

Anyone would be envious of the relationship I have with my sister. Lynnette & I have been best buds from the years of sharing a bedroom to several times living in separate states. It always saddens me to discover other women with sisters who don't have a relationship with them. For whatever reason they don't have the trust & knowledge of knowing no matter what, "I've got my sister". I'm not a yes person & neither is Lynnette. If I'm right about something she's definitely got my back. If I'm wrong she's definitely got my back but not without caveats. I can call her any time for any reason and she's never shocked nor appalled by anything I tell her. She's just there. Yes. We argue. The longest silence has lasted about 2 days. I will always need and love my sister. I truly trust her.

I always say I'm the weakest link in our marriage. Now, that doesn't mean Glen is perfect. Trust me. He's not. No. I'm serious. HE'S REALLY NOT. But he's one loyal, devoted friend. We are so opposite. When people see us together for the first time we can see the "huh?" in their eyes. After 20 years we just figure if they hang with us long enough they'll get it. :-)

So, here it goes. He's a man. I'm a woman. He's tall. I'm short. He's white. I'm black....jet black. He's good-lookin'. I'm better lookin'. He's soft spoken. I'm a bit....eh....explosive. He's brilliant. .....um....well....uh....I try. Nevertheless, it works. I admire good, solid, strong, healthy marriages but I'd want none other than the one we have. Glen's my macho man.

Heidi & I became friends right after my twins were born. She & her husband had not had kids yet but Heidi was chomping at the bit. One afternoon I asked her if she'd help me get a two hour break from the newborns. I'll never forget having the time of my life alone doing nothing. I remember smiling & thinking to myself, "What a Wonderful World". I drove around and stopped wherever I wanted for 5, maybe 10 minutes at each destination. I came back home with nothing but a big grin & a happy heart. Now here's the funny part. I don't remember Heidi even saying goodbye. She blew the doors off running out of the apartment. My husband had to fix the front door hinges when he got home from work.
I CRACKED UP! Okay. This is a bit of an exaggeration but I'm tellin' ya....I'll never forget how hastily Heidi made ghost.

We've been friends ever since. Heidi is 9 years my junior and the 1st born of her family. She's a bossy thing with a bit of a temper. Perfect. I can deal with looking in the mirror just fine. *wink* Since our early encounter we've had more kids at about the same time, we've put on extra back, gone camping together, taken family trips and endured living on opposite ends of the US. We still talk but not as much as I like. The phone minutes have gone down drastically since opening Yorkshire Yarns. I hate that but it'll be a necessary evil for quite some time.

Now, Shannon...she's a bit of an enigma. She's as busy and twitterpated as I but she's always a clear thinker. I call Shannon when I just don't get it. No. I'm serious. She has a way of speaking clarity & truth in such a way that reveals Christ as her backbone. And she does it without being preachy and "religious". Okay...okay. She's the wife of a wonderful preacher man. That helps. But I've been around enough of my sisters in Christ to know when I run into the most secure, honest, real deal. Please understand this is not an ad for her but Shannon Woodward happens to be a published & talented writer and she's a mom to two of the most interesting kids I've known. Because we're both a bit busy when we do get a chance to see one another we have a ball. Somehow, we both get all our words in. And like my other homies, nothing shocks her & I can ring her phone any time.

Are you seeing a pattern here? Most of my closest, inner-circle friends stand on their own. They think for themselves. They're honest. Each one of them treats everyone with same respect & kindness they give me. We have unconditional love for one another. And each happens to be first-born. :-)

This may not fit everyone's profile for best buddies but it surely fits my needs. My friends & I don't talk daily but we know how to pick-up where we left off. (Yep. That includes Glen baby.)

Do you have a friend you love? If not, you should. There nothing more comforting than knowing when we have people in our lives that we can trust. Trust me on this one. :-)



4 comments:

Shannon said...

Now you've done it. I was already missing you and thinking, When can I squeeze in a drive down to Lakewood? And now I'm ready to blow off my schedule and come down for a week!

Right back at you, Sonya. You're a huge blessing to me, and someone I am proud to call my friend. I hate that you're so far away, but I love what God is doing in and through you.

Thank you for all that. And thanks for letting me know. :)

Shannon said...

Oh! And I find it amazing that we're all firstborns. I didn't pick up on that until you pointed it out. How does that work? How do we not all boss each other to death?

Amy H said...

It was great to catch up with you a little bit on Friday. Thanks for letting me interrupt your work day. My mom wants to come visit you now when she is in the area in November.

I loved reading about the friends who have been so consistent in your life. God is good!

Hope to catch up again with you...this time without 10 years in between!

Sonya Kaye said...

What?! Your mom will be here in November? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE bring her in.

Thanks for coming in and bringing your beautiful girls with you. I still can't believe it's been so long. Yes. God IS good. ALL the time. :-)